20 Ways to Create Your Own Happiness

20 Ways to Create Your Own Happiness

20 ways to create your own happiness

If you are asked what you want the most in your life, your answer most probably would be “happiness”. A happy life is something all of us want.

It is not just you. Happiness is a powerful tool and one of the most sought-after commodities in the entire world. 

Does it mean that an overwhelming majority of the population is unhappy? Is that why they are chasing their own happiness all the time?

Or does it imply that people are happy because they were successful in the pursuit of their own happiness?

These are tricky questions to answer. Identifying trends about happiness is not an easy task.

Instead, let us try to find answers to questions that are more personal. Such as,

  • What does it mean to find your own happiness?
  • How important is it to be happy?
  • What are the 7 keys to happiness?
  • Can you create your own happiness?
  • How can you make yourself happy?

This article is an attempt at understanding the power of happiness and the reason why we put a premium on happiness. And, everything you need to know about how to find happiness on your own.

What is the meaning of happiness?

Defining happiness is a Herculean task. It is more like trying to build a castle in the air – a stretch goal. It is hard, challenging, and almost impossible to achieve.

The reason is simple. Happiness means different things to different people. What makes a person happy may not have the same effect on others. But we will give it a try.

Happiness is an emotional state that encompasses the feelings of joy, pleasure, delight, comfort, peace, playfulness, contentment, fulfillment, satisfaction, and more. How a person experiences their own happiness depends on what makes them happy.

Here are some more details about happiness. So that you get a clearer picture.

  • Happiness is a feeling or an emotion and not an attribute. It is not part of a person’s character. 
  • Happiness is not permanent. It doesn’t remain the same way forever. Based on your current experience and mental state, it goes up and down.
  • Happiness is a byproduct of fulfillment or satisfaction. Meaning, you feel happy when you achieve what you set out to do.
  • Happiness is felt deep inside as well as it is an outward expression or a display for the outside world. It can be either an inside job or an external experience or a combination of both.
  • Happiness is a positive emotion. There is nothing negative about it.

Even though the definition of happiness is complicated, the emotion itself is simple to attain. The route to happiness is uncomplicated and easy to figure out.

What are the 7 keys to happiness?

“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” – Gandhi

One of the biggest misconceptions about happiness is that you achieve it only as an offshoot of accomplishing something rather than finding your own happiness during the process. The cause-effect strategy to find happiness has many drawbacks; your own happiness is entirely dependent on the success of the mission. Though there is no harm in embracing this approach.

On the other hand, creating happiness on its own first and working towards success is a more practical and effective approach. Or better still is the approach of enjoying the path to the goal and finding your own happiness in it.

Here are the 7 keys that can open a world of happiness for you.

  • Live in the present moment.
  • Be resilient and learn to adapt.
  • Prioritize your focus and energy.
  • Take a step back and relax to activate your creativity.
  • Love and treat yourself as well as you love your family and friends.
  • Step out of your comfort zone.
  • Make your feelings of empathy evident.

How to create your own happiness?

create your own happiness

Each one of us has our own definition for happiness and our own idea of how to achieve happiness. What works for one may not work for another.

Scientists who have studied happiness and wellbeing in-depth have come up with these do’s and don’ts to find happiness.

  • Do not try seeking happiness. Don’t chase it, live it.
  • Don’t obsess over little things you can’t control.
  • Don’t chase perfection.
  • Stop comparing yourself to others.
  • Don’t judge or slander others. 
  • Build your self-worth. Higher self-esteem brings happiness.
  • Gratitude is a strong emotion that can trigger happiness.
  • Selfless generosity and help offer a sure path to happiness.
  • A fit body, a sound mind, and better health lead to happiness.
  • Being in the company of positive people will bring happiness.
  • Invent opportunities to smile and laugh. Happiness naturally follows.

20 ways to make yourself happy

These are general guidelines to find happiness for anyone. You may find some of them suitable for your personality while the rest are incompatible or incongruous. You can choose the methods that appeal to you.

One of the most crucial points to remember when searching for your own happiness is that it is not something you get from someone or someone else can give you. Happiness is something you create within yourself. 

What happiness means and the paths to happiness may be different for each one of us but the destination or the feeling is the same. 

1. Find your life purpose

Drifting aimlessly in our lives is no fun. When you know that you are doing something constructive for the betterment of yourself, others, and society as a whole, you tend to feel more content and happier. 

Just the awareness that you are rising above your selfish needs and striving to be part of something great is a fulfilling experience.

Our guide on how to find your purpose and passion in life may be of interest to you.

2. Listen to your heart

Often you rely on logic and reasoning to make your choices. Though these will lead you to your goals successfully, they don’t guarantee you happiness. On the other hand, your heart goes by what appeals to you and what makes you happy.

Your heart will tell you the emotional impact of your own actions and thoughts. Learn to align your heart and mind so that the best course of action will also offer you the best shot at happiness.

3. Assume the best

The sad truth is your mind is hardwired to entertain negative thoughts. The default setting of your mind is to think negatively. This means you are always assuming the worst. And, this is not exactly the recipe for happiness.

You can change your mental setting. Shifting mindsets is not easy to achieve or something that happens overnight. Cultivate the habit of looking at the positive side of things.

4. Love yourself

It is good to be selfless and love others unconditionally. Go right ahead and do that. But only you should feature at the top of your priority list. Because you will not occupy the top spots in any others. 

Embrace yourself for who you are. Don’t allow the opinion of others to deter you from this. Remind yourself that you owe this to yourself, no matter the consequences. 

5. Reward yourself

All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. You may have come across this proverb. You can give this a little twist. All work and no reward make you unhappy.

Working hard and maintaining your focus is good for achieving goals and success. What is the point of success, when you don’t have the time or inclination to enjoy things? Taking time out for self-care is vital for happiness.

6. Stay true to yourself

Your beliefs play a major role in making who you are. When your thoughts and actions are not in alignment with your core self, there is bound to be a clash. And internal conflict will always lead to unhappiness and loss of mental peace.

When you are tempted to think, say or do things that go against who you really are, you should come up with a preventive mechanism to act as a deterrent.

7. Align with your moral values

Moral values are the habits and goals that allow you to distinguish between right and wrong. You gain them from the time you are born from your parents and influential elders both knowingly and unawares. It is the standard set by society for your behavior.

When you do or say something that goes against what you consider as morally correct, you may end up feeling unhappy even after achieving what you set out to do. The more you align your behavior with your morality, the better it will make you feel.

8. Do things you love and enjoy

This is a no-brainer. Most of us know that we feel happy when we are engaged in doing something we love in our lives. However, understanding this is not enough; you need to follow it as well.

Often in the pursuit of greater things and bigger goals in life, you forget about the little things that bring you more joy. You set aside this simple truth and give priority to gains and successes, both materialistic and otherwise. You forget that small pleasures can add up. The casualty here is happiness.

9. Go along with what is working

Often, we think that to achieve success, we should swim against the current. We set near-impossible goals for ourselves in our lives and drive ourselves up the wall trying to achieve them. It is time to reconsider this yardstick for success.

What exactly do you achieve by pushing yourself so hard that you feel guilty and miserable? Try going with the choice that works well for you so that you will be feeling happy in the process.

10. Be open to change

Yes, you do have your beliefs and moral values. You have a clear idea of what is right and wrong. However, holding on to them like a dog with a bone is not going to help you in any way. 

Be flexible to changes and be adaptable to new ideas. At least hear them out with an open mind and try to see their merits. After all, as the saying goes, the only constant in life is change. So, you better get used to it.

11. Change yourself, not others

When you are interacting with other people, there will be a mismatch of ideas and ideals. This is natural as no two people think exactly alike. The trouble starts when you try to change the other person. 

The earlier you realize that no one can change another person by force, the better it is for you. If you would like to avoid stress and want harmony, it is better to bring about the change in yourself. It is easier and always turns out better.

12. Change for yourself, not for others

You may have identified your problem areas in behavior and want to change them. The change will be easier, effective, and long-lasting if you are doing it for yourself. 

If you don’t believe or want the change and are going through with it to make another person happy, in all probability, it will end up as a failure and you will feel miserable for having succumbed to the pressure and not holding your ground. Anything you do, do it for yourself.

13. Do things you believe in

You may come across people in your everyday life who have a huge influence on you. This is good news as long as you do proper analysis and check the alignment of these thoughts and beliefs with your values. 

If you allow yourself to be influenced blindly by others’ thoughts and actions, you are in trouble. It is your own happiness that becomes a casualty in the process.

14. Learn to laugh at yourself

The ability to laugh at yourself can do away with many bad situations. Criticism, ridicule, mocking, or poking fun won’t evoke negative emotions in you as it would otherwise. It is no fun for you when you are at the wrong end of the conversation. 

But if you know how to take things in a light vein and not take it too literally or seriously, it can save you much heartburn. Life would be easier and happier.

For more on this topic, see our article how to lighten your mood with laughter therapy.

15. Train your mind to appreciate simple pleasures

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars. Missing the forest for the trees is another way of putting it. However, does this always work to your advantage?

When you are constantly looking at the bigger picture at the expense of the finer details, aren’t you losing out on enjoying the smaller gains? Learning to relish all experiences, big or small, is the key to true happiness.

For more details, see our guide on how to be grateful for what you have or our recommended 500 things to be grateful for today.

16. Believe that there is always room for improvement

When something goes wrong, especially if it is a much-anticipated event, you feel as if it is the end of the world or at least the end of the road. The truth is there is hope as long as you are alive to fight another battle.

Living is a constant improvement process. As long as there is scope for improvement, there is hope left for you. The earlier you embrace this truth, the happier you would be.

17. Develop positive thinking

There is an undeniable connection between happiness, self-confidence, and a positive mindset. One leads to the other, forming a beautiful virtuous cycle. 

When you are having a hard time finding your own happiness in daily life, turn to positive thinking. As long as you are convinced that you can achieve whatever you want to and overcome any obstacles, nothing can stop you from being happy.

18. Clear the mental clutter periodically

Bad news, thoughts, and beliefs have this nasty tendency to pile up and stay put in your mind firmly. And, they are not harmless or idle either. They do their wicked tricks sitting in the corner of your mind. 

The need of the hour is to banish them from your mind. This is easier said than done. Often you are not even aware of their existence or the harm they are causing. Spring cleaning of the mind is the solution. Meditation, gratitude, and affirmations are the most effective tools for this cause.

19. Play your strengths

You may be thinking about the outcome and related emotions when you set your goals. However, you may be exposing your weaknesses while your strengths remain unutilized. This is not exactly the kind of situation that will help you feel good and happy.

Identifying your strengths and utilizing them to the best of your abilities can bring you success. Then, happiness will be a natural byproduct.

20. Believe that the best is yet to come

Hope for the future is what keeps you going despite setbacks. You should not allow major or minor setbacks in the past to deter you from pursuing your life purpose. 

Having an optimistic outlook about the future has a big say on your own happiness levels. With such a positive belief, you can make the impossible possible. And a sense of achievement like that can bring you happiness beyond your wild dreams.

You may also want to take a look at the ultimate guide to live a simple life and be happy.

Bottom line

Most people think of their own happiness as a temporary state of mind that ebbs and flows as per their current mood. There is some truth in this. If you treat your own happiness as a mood, it is. It will remain so. 

However, you have the choice to make it your goal by itself rather than as a side effect of accomplishing something else like money, material possessions, attractiveness, a coveted job, or a loving relationship. Though there is nothing wrong with being happy at your successes, relying on accomplishments alone for your own happiness may not be a good idea.

Although material possessions and wealth are good to have and can make you happy, they are not prerequisites to your own happiness. Instead, try doing something that you love or spending time with people you love. The experience itself will bring you happiness.


"Be happy for this moment. This moment is your life."

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