Getting into a relationship is not the hardest part of it. It is rather establishing an emotional attraction.
Physical attraction is the first trigger in a relationship. It is something that brings two individuals together to form a relationship. The trouble with physical attraction is that it is short-lived and difficult to sustain.
To make a relationship work, last longer, and turn into something more meaningful, you need to be emotionally attracted to each other. This also can bolster physical attraction and make it remain in the relationship for longer.
This leads us to the question – What is meant by emotional attraction? How can you trigger emotional attraction?
This article explores the concept of emotional attraction from the perspective of a woman. Here, you will find ways to create emotional attraction with a man.
How to define emotional attraction?
It is often referred to as the bonding of the minds. It is the deeper connection formed by the feeling of strong emotions. When the minds of two individuals connect, the relationship is elevated from a casual fling to a more committed relationship.
To trigger emotional attraction in a man, both the partners need to feel the same level of bonding. So, as a woman, you may feel an emotional connection. But unless your partner reciprocates your feelings, the bonding doesn’t happen in the right sense. You can take steps to connect with a man emotionally.
As the saying goes, men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Women are hardwired to think and function with their hearts. Usually, they have a hard time figuring out why men are impervious to deeper emotions and building stronger bonds.
If you are earnest about the relationship and want to develop it into something more serious and long-lasting, it is up to you to reach out to your partner and help in creating a strong emotional connection. Because we know that physical or sexual attraction is fleeting and it is the emotional attraction that forms the foundation of any relationship. It can make or break a relationship.
How to recognize healthy emotional attraction?
Emotional attachment is the feeling of love, affection, and closeness in a relationship that goes beyond physical and sexual attraction.
Physical attachment is all about loving someone for the sake of what they can do, offer, or provide in the physical sense. When love for the person transcends this physical nature and covers the moral support and mutual sharing, it enters the plane of healthy attachment.
It is an emotional attraction when you love someone to fulfill your need for companionship, intimacy, and validation.
It is tricky to recognize emotional attraction in yourself, let alone in your partner. All you can do is look for signs of emotional attachment. These include enjoying spending time with each other, eagerness to be with each other, and exclusivity in the relationship.
An overdose of elixir can also kill. The same applies to emotional attraction. It is good for the relationship but when you go overboard with it and turn it into an obsession, it is a sign of unhealthy attachment.
A healthy emotional attraction is about investing time in the relationship without compromising on your independence, space, or dreams. A healthy relationship doesn’t involve surrendering your time, ambition, goals, and freedom of choice. This balancing act is vital for the success of the relationship.
8 ways to build emotional attraction with a man
Here are some fail-safe methods you can adopt to make a guy get emotionally attracted to you and fall in love.
1. Connect with him on a deeper level
No doubt that physical or sexual attraction has a huge role in bringing the two of you together. However, if you focus on only the physical aspect of the relationship, there is a chance that it will fizzle out in some time. If you want a more meaningful and long-lasting relationship with him, connect with him on an emotional and intellectual level.
The ideal way to make it happen is by spending time getting to know each other through conversations. Show genuine interest in who he is, what he is doing, and what he has achieved. At the same time, show him who you are and what you are capable of without resorting to bragging. Mutual appreciation and respect can do wonders for a relationship.
2. Respect him for who he is and not for what he can be
This is basic human nature. To be accepted, loved, and respected for who they really are. At least some women commit the mistake of choosing a partner based on their future prospects, or what they are capable of becoming.
When you start dating a guy, you may like some of his attributes. That is alright, as two individuals can’t agree on everything under the sun. However, if you continue the relationship in the hope that you can influence and change his undesirable aspects, you are going about it the wrong way.
From day one, if you are trying to change the person to suit your goal, you are as good as throwing a wet blanket on the relationship. He will get the feeling that he is not enough and you do not appreciate who he is. No one would want to be with someone who makes them feel ashamed or anxious for who they are.
3. Make him feel safe enough to express himself freely
When a person is mocked, ridiculed, or judged, they won’t feel like opening up or expressing themselves without restraints. Create a safe environment for him to communicate with you freely.
Finding faults, snide remarks and critical comments can destroy a relationship even before it has a chance to flourish. Though these are usually expressed in words, you can also show them through your actions and behavior.
In the early days of the relationship, what is unsaid carries as much impact and importance as the words actually said. So, be careful about both. Ensure that he feels comfortable talking to you without holding anything back.
4. Use playful banter
Playfulness has a significant role in maintaining a light atmosphere in the relationship. People enjoy lighter moments and happy times and would want to be with someone who can keep it that way. Moreover, they tend to associate those feelings with you, which can work in your favor.
Men usually take more time to decide on a relationship and they tend to give more importance to how you make them feel when you are with them. If you can keep the atmosphere light and enjoyable with light-hearted banter, you have a better chance to build emotional attraction with him.
5. Show your vulnerable side
When two individuals start dating, they always show their best aspects to each other in an effort to impress and bowl them over. This definitely helps to get things going. However, in the next stage, you need to change your tactics to build a stronger bond with each other. You need to reveal your weaker side.
Most people consider this as the death knell for a relationship. They couldn’t be more wrong. The shortest route to gain trust and create emotional attraction in a relationship is by dropping your guard and showing him your vulnerable side. This is bound to put them at ease as they feel less pressure to be perfect. It is also an invitation to know more about you and show you their own weaknesses.
6. Offer him space to develop the bond
You may want to go ahead in the relationship at a faster pace but he may not be ready for that. You need to consider this aspect and give him enough space to do it his way. When you are relentlessly pursuing him and the relationship, he may find the going tough and decide to end it.
Men tend to be more easy-going in a relationship, while women are more eager to commit. Your overenthusiasm may also be misconstrued as an effort to hide undesirable things from him. Do remember that men need more time to build emotional attraction and you need to be in tune with his pace.
7. Don’t hit the panic button
When a woman in a relationship notices a slight change in the attitude or behavior of their partner, they tend to interpret it as the end and panic. Once the fear of abandonment sets in, you may find them doing things that are detrimental to the relationship.
For instance, if the guy doesn’t call or text or seems a bit more distant than usual, it can make women take extreme measures to win over and get back their partner. Without much thought, they just assume the worst-case scenario of desertion.
They may call or text the guy repeatedly in a panic to get in touch with them. They try to make up for his perceived disinterest with their overzealous behavior. They try to take charge of the situation and the relationship and lead to where they think it should be.
A point women fail to realize is that this action can only make the situation worse. A sudden change in the dynamics of the relationship usually doesn’t go well with men. Even if there was no issue, to begin with, this will make him want to run away.
8. Don’t reveal too much about yourself
The charm of a relationship is in getting to know each other. Once you know everything you need to know about each other, the appeal or the allure is gone. Leave the mystery element for longer by refraining from oversharing. If you are good at this, you can even build up your story to make it something worthy to be pursued.
As long there is something more left to know about you, he will be ready to commit more time and energy to find it out. This means, spending more time in conversation with you. There is no better way to build emotional attraction with him than that.
If you are serious about the relationship, the best advice would be “Don’t jump into bed too soon with him”. If you do that the thrill of pursuit and the aura of mystery is lost forever. Building a strong channel for communication is the perfect route to creating emotional attraction.
Do remember that emotional attraction cannot be forced on others. You can set the stage but if it is not happening, be patient and ready to give him time and space. You should also be open to the idea that maybe he is not the right guy for you.
Even if you are head over heels in love with this guy, if you are unable to connect with him emotionally, there is no future for the relationship. It is better to get out of it, instead of wasting your time and energy on making it work. You may also want to take a look at our guide on how to know if you have chemistry with someone.