Love is a beautiful feeling. But at the same time, it’s crazy and weird. There is no rhyme or reason for how it comes and goes.
One moment you are head over heels in love with someone. A while later, you find yourself out of love. You have lost your loving feelings for the person.
If you have had such an experience, you would know how disillusioned this will make you feel. You have no clue what to do about it or how to move forward. You may ask yourself how to love someone again after losing feelings. Is it even possible?
Love and romantic feelings are not constants in any relationship. It is a roller coaster ride, going up and down as life moves forward. Loving someone less or more is a natural part of life and is normal. For you, the trouble began when you fell out of love and lost feelings for your partner. Can you ever love them again the same way? Can you bring back the lost feelings?
This article explores this specific aspect of a relationship and comes up with some astounding truths. Here you will find out how to love someone again after losing feelings. You may find it reassuring that you can retrieve the love you had for the person and revive your relationship.
How to love someone again after losing feelings?
Once upon a time, you were crazy in love with this person. Slowly, over the years, it eroded and there is not a shred of those romantic feelings left in you. You have completely lost feelings for the person.
This may also happen when you stumble upon a piece of information about your partner that will turn off the love you feel for them. Now that the misunderstanding has been cleared, you still find it hard to love them again.
Whether you lost feelings for your partner slowly or suddenly, to love someone again after losing feelings is no easy matter. Here are a few suggestions you can try for finding love in your heart and spark in your relationship.
1. Stop being overcritical
As the initial euphoria of the relationship settles down, you may begin to see the flaws in your partner. It may slowly build up to a point where you can see only their flaws. You start being overcritical mostly over trivial things.
For example, you may find your partner’s voice or mannerisms irritating. You will build this up to such levels that you cannot stand their presence anymore. But if you pause a moment to think about it, you will know how trivial it is.
Take an honest view of the situation. Is this something new in your partner? Maybe it was always there and you failed to notice it as you were blinded by love at the beginning. Only now can you see their faults clearly.
Your partner has done nothing wrong. So, why make life difficult for them? Do you think it is fair? Can you set things right by ignoring this aspect of your partner and finding love for them? Don’t you think it is their pluses and minuses that make your partner who they are?
It would be unfair of you to pick and choose what you want and reject the rest. Relationships cannot succeed if this is the case.
2. Make a list of all the things you like about your partner.
Again, your honesty is vital for the success of this. Even if you find your partner annoying, you would still love and appreciate some things about them. Maybe your partner is unconditional in their love or always has a smile on their face, even when they are worried and frustrated.
You have always admired your partner’s positive outlook on life or their generous nature. Instead of focusing on their negative character traits, pay attention to the good things in them. Remember what made you fall in love with your partner in the first place.
Highlight their good side and train your mind to dwell on it. Finding love is not that hard. You will fall in love with your partner all over again in no time.
3. Reminisce about the good times
Not so long ago, you loved your partner. Relive those happy memories. How happy you were in the relationship! How much you wanted to be together!
You can still go back and feel the same kind of love. You are the only one who changed. You may have a reason for the change in attitude. Do you really think it was worth it? Do you think you may have been mistaken or misled? Maybe it was all just a misunderstanding.
Do you miss those beautiful moments with your partner? When you relive those moments, you will be reminded of why you fell in love with your partner in the first place. The more you see their positive side, the more likely you will fall in love with them again.
Besides reliving the moment, also try to recreate those moments by spending time with each other and going out on romantic dates.
Love may not happen overnight. So, with patience and perseverance, finding love is possible.
4. Appreciate and respect your partner
These are two vital ingredients of a healthy relationship. You lost your love for your partner because you discovered something undesirable about them. That doesn’t take away the host of qualities you loved about them.
Even as you try to clear the misunderstanding that froze your loving feelings for your partner, you can give more prominence to the traits you have always liked. Show your respect and appreciation for those aspects of their character.
When you like something about your partner, it is no use keeping it hidden and buried in your heart. Unless you let your partner know how you feel, those beautiful impressions and loving feelings are wasted. So, it is up to you to make the most of the positive loving feelings you have towards your partner.
Let them know about it through appreciation and by showing respect.
5. Be kind and compassionate
Kindness and compassion have nothing to do with loving feelings. These are the feelings that make us humans. You can be kind and compassionate to anyone you come across in your life. Show the same privilege or benefit to your partner, even though some misunderstandings need sorting out.
Do you know that you can be kind to your partner even if you don’t love them anymore? Even when you argue and have serious disagreements, you can still treat your partner with respect. When you have empathy for your partner, you may find it easier to understand them. You could figure out why they did what they did.
When you are kind towards your partner, you can ensure that things don’t go out of control. Even when you have serious conflicts, if you can retain feelings of compassion towards your partner, you have a better chance of reuniting.
Here are some more suggestions to help you love someone again after losing feelings.
- Help them pursue their dreams.
- Repeat those things you like to do together with your partner.
- Try out new experiences with your partner.
- Have open conversations with your partner.
- Don’t hide things from your partner. Be open and honest.
- Take some time to self-reflect and decide what you want in the relationship.
- Decide which ones of your feelings are real and more important.
- Demonstrate your loving feelings for them.
- Desist from playing mind games.
- Take some time out from the relationship.
- Relearn to trust your partner.
- Weigh the pros and cons of the situation to gain clarity.
- Get your priorities right and make compromises.
- Go on romantic dates with your partner.
- Try individual and couples counseling.
Final thoughts on how to fix a relationship when one is losing feelings
That is the million-dollar question.
You lost love for your partner probably for no fault of either of you. Even if it’s someone’s fault, it is clear that you want to forgive and forget and rekindle the loving feelings you used to feel for your partner. Bringing back lost feelings in a romantic relationship is not easy but not impossible.
Since you want to love again, clearly, all is not lost. You just need to push the right buttons to bring out the right reactions in you. The suggestions listed in this article will help you figure out the right buttons, where they are located, and how to push them. You can use similar strategies to get someone back who lost feelings for you.
Rest assured, the happy days will be back again in no time.