Breakups are hard and traumatic. But if you never saw it coming, it can be harder.
When your partner walks out of the relationship, you cannot be faulted for being angry and devastated. You’re just being human. It’s hard to let go of someone you love.
Once the dust settles down on the breakup, your thoughts would veer towards plans to keep him or make him come back. Can you really make him fall in love again after a breakup?
Yes, of course, you can. He was in love with you once and you’re still in love with him. Maybe it was a misunderstanding that led to the breakup. If you can manage to clear things up and make him see the truth, you can make him reconsider the breakup.
So, the next question is how to make him fall in love again after a breakup.
But before you go ahead with these suggestions, make sure that reconciliation is what you want. Was that just a misunderstanding that led to the breakup or is it something more serious and deep-rooted? Do you realistically think that you can be happy in the relationship?
If the answers to these questions are “yes”, go right ahead and work your charms on your ex-partner. This article explores this difficult phase of a relationship and offers some constructive suggestions for you to try out. Here you will find simple ways to make him fall in love again after a breakup.
How to make him fall in love again after a breakup?
1. Take it easy
Don’t rush into it. Don’t strangle your ex for attention. Be patient and give him space and time.
This may not seem important to you or you may even think that wasting time may reduce your chances of getting back together. Just remember that emotions, decisions, and relationships cannot be rushed through.
You may be missing him and want him back immediately. But if you start pursuing him too soon, he may run further away from you. Clearly, he had some issues with you that made him decide to break up. Unless those issues are resolved and the misunderstandings cleared, he may not want to reunite.
Life is unfair and takes its own path. It is least bothered about your feelings or desires. This is one of those situations. Wait patiently for things to turn around. When the opportunity arises, make sure you make the most of it. Until then, take it easy.
2. Don’t hide your emotions
When your partner walks away from you, you may want to put up a stoic front just to tell him and the world in general that you don’t care. Even when you’re falling apart inside, you would be brave and not shed a tear. Nor would you talk about how devastated you are.
In a relationship, it is vital to be open, genuine, and honest. Unless you can share your happiness, worries, sadness, and anger with your partner, how can you expect it to be healthy and long-lasting?
The trouble is also with men in this regard. They may expect their partner to be smiling and pleasant all the time. They feel the limited time they get to spend with each other should not be wasted away on negative things.
You should set this as one of the ground rules early on in the relationship. As long as your partner is aware of your feelings and thoughts, you would find it easier to communicate with each other. This will help in clearing misunderstandings and making him aware that you still love him and want him back.
3. Let him know that you accept his decision
When you are trying to make him fall in love again after a breakup, your desperation may make him feel cornered. Even as you reveal your desire to have him back in your life, make him aware that you’ll understand if his answer is “no”.
You should know by now that in a relationship, you cannot force your partner to say or do things against their wishes. He isn’t coming back if he doesn’t want to. You would be wasting your time and his by thinking otherwise.
But if you go ahead and force this decision on him, even if he comes back to you, it would be short-lived. He was never happy with the decision in the first place. The moment he will get a chance, he will bolt.
4. Make him miss you and yearn for your presence
You may think this is improbable considering he walked out on you. But nothing is impossible in matters of the heart. The best part is you can make your ex miss you without talking to him.
The first step in making this possible is believing in it yourself. When you are not convinced that you can make him fall in love with you again over text message, how can you manage to convince your partner the same?
Also, you need to stop blaming yourself for what happened. It was him who walked out on you. He took the decision and you had nothing to do with it. You need to love yourself before making someone else love you.
You may have heard the saying – “Distance makes the heart grow fonder”. Work hard on improving yourself, even as you stay away from him. You may be tempted to call him but refrain from this. Let him miss you nice and good.
If he walked out in a huff over something trivial and won’t listen to your arguments, this is the best tactic to adopt. You need to do nothing, he will come back on his own when he misses your presence in his life.
5. Trigger jealousy in him
Be forewarned that this can be a make-or-break move. Sometimes this will work like a charm but there is always a possibility that you’ll end up making it worse.
There are all kinds of jealous feelings that you can evoke in your ex-partner at this stage. It can be about another guy you are showing interest in. Or about the things you have always done together and now you’re doing alone.
You can also make him feel jealous of things he can do for you. While you were together, he would have felt happy and content to do little things for you and make you feel good. Now that he broke up with you, he must be feeling a bit lost and sad. By staying away, you can heighten this feeling.
6. Bring alive his hero instinct
Hero instinct is a term coined by James Bauer, the relationship expert who wrote the famous book His Secret Obsession. Hero instinct relates to the urge felt by men to protect and provide for the people he loves.
When a man’s hero instinct is triggered, he will make any sacrifices to make you happy and feel secure. If you aren’t aware of this magic tool, it’s high time you learn about it and how to trigger the hero instinct in your man.
If you think you have to give up your self-respect or do things that go against your ideals, worry not. You don’t have to demean yourself to make your ex love you again. You just need to trigger certain emotions and signals in him, making him feel needed by you.
Give him a chance to take on the role of your hero. The rest will fall into place on its own.
Learn more about triggering hero instinct in a man from James Bauer.
Final thoughts on making him fall in love again after a breakup
If you feel like it, you can make yourself look more attractive. You can make some basic changes in your life such as getting a new job, a new house, or moving to a new city. The most important thing for you to do is not to act needy and desperate and to give him space to change his mind about you.
You can try to understand why he left you in the first place. Something you should never do is put pressure on him to return to you or take revenge on him by flirting with other guys. Keep your distance from him whether it is in person, over the phone, or on social media. If he wants to, he will come back to you.
Now that you have all the tools and know what to do, you can make him fall in love again after a breakup.