If you are single and looking for relationships, you would often come across a situation when you are attracted to someone, but unsure of their feelings towards you.
The only definite way to ascertain this is to approach them directly and ask them outright. However, this is considered inappropriate behavior. In the early days of a relationship, you have to feel your way through the slippery path. The path is indeed tricky and treacherous.
Often, it is difficult to recognize whether the other person is really into you. At times, you mistake their friendly gestures for love and attraction. On the other hand, if the signals are too muted or if you are not paying enough attention, you may miss them altogether.
So, what is the solution to this dilemma? Is there a foolproof method to know if someone is attracted to you?
Yes, there are indeed signs of secret attraction. What is in the mind of a person comes out as involuntary signs and if you care to notice them, it can help you gain insight into the mind of the person.
This article explores the topic of involuntary signs of attraction and how you can use them to your advantage. Also, find here listed the 10 most prominent signs of emotional and physical attraction.
How to use body language to build strong relationships?
We think most of our communication happens through the spoken word. This is far from reality, especially in the context of a relationship. Non-verbal communication or body language plays a huge role in conveying our thoughts, feelings, and emotions.
At times body language is more accurate and reliable than verbal communication. It is easier to manipulate what we say to others, but harder to hide the involuntary gestures and expressions. This means body language can be used to create stronger bonds with the people we love and care about.
We all know that good communication is a vital ingredient in a healthy relationship. This includes both verbal and nonverbal communication. Holding hands, gazing into each other’s eyes, laughing, kissing, and cuddling can express a lot more without uttering a single word.
Noticing and understanding body language is also important to maintain good communication. Some of the common expressions and gestures to convey physical attraction and positive feelings towards another person are:
- Mirroring actions and behavior
- Genuine smiles and laughter
- Body posture or how you move and carry yourself
- Maintaining eye contact
- Crossed arms and legs
- Clenched jaws
Using these body language signs you get an inkling of what the other person is thinking about you and whether there are any soft feelings for you. Knowing this can help you take the relationship forward or avoid embarrassing situations.
Here is a list of 10 involuntary behavioral and physical signs you can look out for in the person of interest to ascertain whether they are interested in you.
Top 10 involuntary signs of attraction
Among the involuntary signs, some are behavioral while others are physical attraction signs. Physical signs are indeed easier to detect than behavioral ones, but if you pay enough attention to the person, it is not hard. In fact, offering your undivided attention is the foundation of good communication and thereby a healthy relationship.
1. Mirroring behavior
When someone is interested in you and is attracted to you, they will be observing you at every single opportunity they get. This means they are aware of your gestures and behaviors. To feel closer to you and raise the compatibility levels, they will imitate your behavior without being consciously aware of it.
If you care to notice, you will find them using your facial and verbal expressions more often. As this is hard to fake, this is one of the best clues to check whether someone is finding you attractive.
2. Eye contact
Looking into the eyes of the person you interact with is a common sign of truthfulness and genuine interest in the person. Dilation of pupils is an additional sign of physical attraction. Eye contact can be used as love signals and flirting signs as well.
Pupils dilate or enlarge on various occasions – for better focus, to see in dim light, due to drug use. But if none of the above are true, it can be because the person finds you attractive.
3. Blushing or the flushed look
People may have flushed skin for many reasons – anger, embarrassment, and humiliation. Love can also induce the same effect, making it one of the foolproof indicators of physical attraction.
Blushing happens from a rush of adrenaline and all these are triggers for the adrenaline rush. If you can rule out the rest, you can safely believe that the person has developed soft feelings for you.
4. Altered tone of voice
When we meet someone for the first time, when there are no special feelings involved, we use our normal tone of voice. As we develop an emotional attraction for this person, even without us being aware of it, we change the way we speak. For men, the voice becomes deeper, while for women, it turns more high-pitched.
The reason can also be that you want to stand out in the crowd and catch their attention. As this is a completely involuntary act, you can use this method to gauge your own feelings towards another person.
5. Open body language
You use open body language only in safe and relaxed situations and with someone, you feel secure with and are attracted to. This is a simple way to know what another person is thinking of you.
Some of the common signs of open body language when someone is attracted to you are:
- Closing in on personal space
- Body contact, either accidentally or intentional
- Uncrossed legs and arms
- Leaning forward when talking
- Head tilted to one side
- Open palms facing upwards
- Standing upright with shoulders leveled
6. Preening or primping gestures
When you find another person attractive, your immediate thought would be to make yourself more attractive to catch their attention. This makes you do things like flicking, smoothening, or messing up the hair and straightening, stroking, or smoothening clothes.
These gestures gain more significance if they are done when you are looking away. The other person will use the opportunity to improve their appearance to impress you. Such as adjusting the clothes, removing anything desirable like lint on clothes or food stuck in between teeth, applying lip balm, or licking the lips to make them appear supple and moist.
7. Fidgeting behavior
People fidget when they are excited or anxious. And anxiety can be positive or negative. So, you need to take this together with other positive physical signs. If you find the person fidgeting with anything they can lay their hands on, whether it is something they wear like buttons, their body parts, or fashion accessories, it is worth looking into.
As long as they are not uncomfortable in your presence and are not forced to be with you, it is a sign of nervousness and excitement associated with deep attraction. If fidgeting is accompanied by frequently checking the time or messages on the phone, it is a sign of disinterest. If they are shying away from making eye contact and seem distracted, it is not good news for you.
8. Extended conversations
Irrespective of the mode of communication, if the person displays reluctance in curtailing or concluding the conversation, it is a sign of emotional attraction. You may be speaking to them over the phone, by text, or in person. But whenever you say “Bye, talk to you later”, they will find some pretext to continue the talk.
Naturally, the person wants to continue talking to you because they are enjoying every bit of it. They want to know more about you and want you to know that they are attracted to you.
9. Removing physical barriers
When a person feels drawn to another person, all their actions gravitate towards getting closer to the person in every sense. This includes emotionally and physically. They tend to cut down the personal space between them and try to know them better and get emotionally close to them.
In the endeavor to get physically close to someone, you will remove any physical barrier that comes in the way without consciously thinking about it. Such as a cushion if you are sitting on the same recliner. Or the items on the table like condiment bottles, cups, glasses, cutlery, menu cards, and suchlike, if you are sitting across the table. This involuntary action is considered a prelude to reaching out and touching hands.
10. Take the initiative to make plans
It is not the future together we are talking about here. Just the next meeting place and time. When you feel drawn to someone, it is natural that you want to spend more time with them and don’t want to part without making plans for the next rendezvous.
At times, this tendency is misconstrued as overenthusiasm or pushy. When you really think about it, this is a nice gesture. This way, the schedules and preferences of both can be accommodated, unlike last-minute invites.
When you find someone attractive, you may be reluctant to take the next step as you are unsure of their reaction. Then, you have two choices open to you. Either you can ask them directly or you can look out for involuntary signs of attraction.
The advantage of involuntary signs of attraction is that it is involuntary. In other words, it is not staged or made up for the benefit of the other person. This means, it is sincere and comes from the heart. At times, this is more accurate and truthful than the reply you may get if you ask them directly.
A point to remember when relying on involuntary signs of a person to gauge their interest is that it is very individualistic and hard to generalize. So, to get a clear and correct picture, it is better that you take multiple signs together and get a composite picture.
Ultimately, if you want to be 100% sure, just ask them.
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- What Triggers Emotional Attraction in a Man?
- How to Build Emotional Attraction with a Man?
- 20 Signs of Hidden Male Attraction
- 20 Signs A Girl Likes You But Is Trying Not To Show It
- Signs He is Slowly Falling For You
- Signs You Have a Magnetic Personality
- Body Language of a Man Secretly in Love With You