Have you ever wondered if your ex is hurting after the breakup? If so, you’re not alone. Many people find themselves wondering about their ex’s well-being after a split.
Breaking up is hard for everyone, regardless of how strong or bold they may be. The pain caused by a breakup is often intense and all-consuming. It’s not just women who suffer after a break-up – men do too. In fact, it can be even harder for them to deal with emotions because society expects them to be tough and resilient.
If you want to help your partner heal after a breakup, look out for these common signs he is hurting after the breakup.
1. He finds it hard to let you go
His mind accepts the fact that you have broken up, but his heart refuses to acknowledge the truth. It is still pining for you and your presence. As a result, he will continue to reach out to you. He can’t bring himself to let you go. He uses every tactic to hold on to you.
He will call or text you multiple times a day. He is desperately trying to keep in touch with you.
2. He admits that he is missing you terribly
This is one of the most telling signs he is hurting after the breakup. He will be openly emotional about how much he misses you.
The decision to part ways was taken together, but he finds it difficult to come to terms with the fact. It hits him hard as he wakes up to the reality of the breakup. He feels lost and lonely. He misses you so much that he willingly admits it to you.
He is no longer interested in putting up appearances in front of you. For a man to admit that he is missing his partner after a breakup is not easy. His present mindset is so delicate and vulnerable that he doesn’t have a choice.
3. He’s in denial
Even though the breakup was a mutual decision, he is hit hard by it. He finds it difficult to accept the fact. He behaves as if this is just a phase or a short break. You will get back together again.
Or he thinks he can be persuasive enough to change your mind about the breakup. Even when you tell him that it is your final decision, he is not ready to accept it as your final answer. He continues to hope that you will come back to him. He’s in denial.
4. He’s in a rebound relationship
He finds himself stranded when you parted ways. He finds it too lonely to be single. He feels he is lost without someone in his life. Without wasting much time, he finds someone else to replace you. It satisfies all the criteria of a rebound relationship.
He tries to make peace with a new partner in his life. From his behavior, it is evident that he is hurting from the breakup and trying to dull the pain with this new relationship.
He uses the new partner and relationship as distractions to cope with the trauma of the breakup.
Though he is unaware of this, it will dawn on him sooner or later.
5. He severs ties with you completely
While some men are reluctant to let you go, others find it easier to cope with the breakup trauma by cutting you off. Your presence and your voice are too upsetting for him to handle.
He feels that your constant presence in his daily life will make things worse for him. He feels he won’t be able to cope with the emotional strain with you around.
He feels like running as far away from you as he can. Deleting you from his life is the best coping mechanism for him.
6. He keeps away from you
After you decided to part ways and he or you moved out of your shared home, you have never heard from him. Neither have your mutual friends. It is as if he has gone underground and buried himself in some corner of the world, away from everyone he knows.
This is another method used by some men to cope with the trauma associated with a breakup. He doesn’t want to be near anything that remotely reminds him of you. He is running away from you to deal with the hurt and heal his broken heart. He will surface one day when he has healed completely and feels up to it.
These are some of the signs he is hurting after the breakup. If your ex exhibits any of these behaviors, it is an indication that he is not over you yet and is struggling to deal with the aftermath of the breakup.
7. He will unfriend you on social media
Nowadays, social media is used by many to announce their relationship statuses. After breaking up, he will change his status to “single.” Some men may not be satisfied with this alone. They may also want to cut ties with you in the digital world. They will block you or unfriend you.
He may be doing this to cope with his feelings. Every time he comes across your picture or post, he feels the pain of his wounds all over again. He feels that to heal, he will have to stay away from you in every sense.
8. He moves away
One of the signs he is hurting after the breakup is that he moves away to a completely new place. He wants to start afresh in a new environment with new people around him. He changes his job and relocates to another city or country.
This is another coping mechanism he adopts to manage his breakup trauma. When you are in the same city and moving in the same crowd, you are bound to bump into each other often.
As he is hurting from the breakup, he often finds it painful to come across you or your mutual friends. He decides to change cities to avoid everyone he knows.
When he moves to another city right after a breakup, it clearly indicates he is hurting badly. He is making it easier for himself by moving out of your way and giving himself a safe place and peaceful environment to heal his broken heart.
9. He doesn’t want to talk about what happened
After a breakup, it’s normal for both partners to experience a range of emotions. While one person may be ready to move on quickly, the other may need more time to heal.
If your ex-partner is withdrawn and doesn’t want to talk about what happened, it’s a sign that he’s still hurting. He may be trying to figure out what went wrong and how to fix it.
In the meantime, he’s putting up a wall to protect himself from further pain. If you give him some space, he’ll likely come around in time and be ready to talk when he’s feeling better.
10. He has trouble sleeping or eating
Breakups are never easy, and it’s clear that he is struggling to cope with what happened. He has lost his appetite and is having trouble sleeping, which are both physical signs that he is stressed.
He is also clearly emotionally distraught, as he is worrying and thinking about the breakup constantly. This is taking a toll on his health, both physically and emotionally.
It’s important to give him time to heal and to provide support if he needs it. Only then will he be able to move on from the breakup and start to feel better again.
11. He’s drinking or using drugs more than usual
If your ex is suddenly drinking or using drugs more than usual, it’s a sign that he’s in pain. He’s likely using alcohol or drugs as a way to numb the hurt and loneliness he’s feeling.
This is a dangerous coping mechanism that can lead to addiction and other problems down the road. If you notice this sign, it’s important to reach out to him and offer help and support.
Let him know that you’re there for him and encourage him to seek professional help if necessary. This is an early warning sign that should not be ignored.
12. He’s lashing out in anger
If your guy is suddenly lashing out in anger, it’s a sign that he’s struggling to deal with the breakup healthily. He may be snapping at his friends and family or getting into fights with strangers.
This is a symptom of his emotional distress, and he needs help to cope in a better way.
If you’re concerned about your guy’s well-being, talk to him about what’s going on and offer your support. Help him to find healthy ways to express his emotions and get through this tough time.
13. He’s having trouble concentrating or completing tasks
He’s having trouble concentrating or completing tasks. This is a sign that he’s struggling to get through his days after the breakup.
He may fall behind at work or school because he can’t focus on anything else. If you see these signs, it’s important to reach out and help him get back on track.
Tell him you’re there for him and offer any support you can. Help him make a plan to get through this tough time. He’ll appreciate your help and may even be able to return the favor someday.
14. He’s depressed and hopeless
He’s struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel. He’s feeling down and may be having thoughts of self-harm or suicide. This is a sign that he needs professional help to get through this tough time.
If you observe any of these signs he is hurting after the breakup, give him some time to heal.
Though he may try his best to hide how hurt he is, you may be able to discern his pain if you look hard enough. You may be able to help him if you feel inclined to – sometimes by offering moral support and in other instances by staying away.
Just because he is hurting and you are feeling sorry for him doesn’t mean you should feel guilty and get back together immediately.
If you feel your relationship has lost its meaning and a breakup is inevitable, getting back together is not a good idea now or in the future. Time will heal the wounds of the heart.