You have been with this guy for some time now but don’t know where you stand. That is one frustrating situation to be in, for sure.
You spend a lot of time together. You get along well. You like him and he seems to be interested in you. But he is not making any moves. Nothing has been said.
You feel a connection with him but you are having a hard time figuring out what he wants from you.
It is typically girls who play hard to get. At times, guys also take this approach.
His reluctance to commit can only mean either of the two things – that he is not into you or he wants to make the first move and wants to be chased.
This article explains how to tell what a guy wants from you. You will find here common signs he wants you to make the first move.
How to know if he wants you to chase him?
You have been in relationships before and you have always been chased by guys. You know all about the clear signs that a man is pursuing you.
So, this time also, you are waiting to see whether he will pursue you. And, when he doesn’t you feel confused.
You don’t know whether he wants you to chase him. Or, if it is alright that you chase him and not the other way around. Are you more comfortable with letting the guy chase you?
Too many questions and no answers. Your “relationship” is not making any headway. You feel naturally frustrated. Let us find answers to the first question. Does he want you to chase him? What are the obvious signs that guys want to be chased?
1. He is blowing hot and cold
This is one of the clearest signs of them all. One day is keen to be with you and the next he doesn’t seem to be interested. By paying you no attention, he is drawing you into making the first move. This is a common enough tactic among guys. You may even have come across them before but you left them as you did not understand their motives.
One day he drowns you with calls and messages but there are days when there is no communication from him. The worst part is he doesn’t even explain why he has been silent.
Maybe he is unsure of where he stands with you and wants you to reveal your feelings before he does. Maybe he is doing this because of his previous bad experience. His back story and intentions are irrelevant as long as you know what he wants.
One day he shows his interest in you and the next day, he is probably afraid that he was too bold earlier and stays quiet. When a guy acts like this, it can only mean one thing – he wants you to chase him.
2. He seems to ignore his feelings
He was the one who started it all. He clearly lets you know that he is interested in you. Then, he is not willing to take it any further. He is not telling you that he likes you, or letting you know how he feels about you or asking you out on a date. He is hesitating to do anything more. Even if he asks you out, he is not acting on it.
It may look as if he is ignoring or suppressing his feelings towards you. Maybe he doesn’t have the courage or confidence to take this forward. Or he is unable to read the signs you are giving him. Maybe it is time for you to be bold and start chasing him instead of waiting to be chased.
3. He is playing mind games with you
If he is indulging in mind games, there is no doubt about his intentions. He wants you to chase him.
At this stage, it would be hard to decipher why he wants to be chased rather than chase you. Maybe he has been made to run around in circles by some girl before. Or he doesn’t have the confidence to do this. Or maybe you are giving out confusing signals. The reasons can be any one of these.
When he plays hard to get, things may get tough for you. When you find that they are too hard to please, you may lose interest in them altogether. Playing hard to get can be tricky.
If you lose interest in the guy and move to greener pastures, our guy may exhibit signs of jealousy. That is a clear sign that he is genuinely interested in you. At this stage, you can come back to him, if you want to. You can also use this approach to get him more interested in you and prompt him into action.
4. He sets things in motion and then vanishes into thin air
You met him at a party one day and you two hit it off really well. Promises were made to keep in touch and meet up again the next day. After this, there is no sign of him. No calls, no texts. Your calls and texts remain unanswered.
Naturally, you are confused. You fail to understand what is expected of you and what you should do. Again, why he is acting like this is hard to understand until you know him well.
There is a high likelihood that he wants to be chased. If you are keen on pursuing a relationship with this guy, you can take the initiative and chase him.
5. He comes back after some time
So, this guy vanished after the first encounter. Maybe he expected you to chase him. But you were reluctant to do this as you were feeling confused about his intentions. You went along with your life and one fine day, you spotted this guy again.
He made it look as if he casually bumped into you. But you know for sure that this is not the case. Most probably he disappeared thinking you will chase him. When you did not, he returned as he wanted to pursue a relationship with you.
This time around, he is bolder and more open with his feelings. But there is still a chance that he is playing around with you. Maybe he is trying to hook you in and then vanish so that you will start chasing him
It is up to you to decide whether you want to chase this guy. Use your gut feeling to gauge his feelings and intentions and proceed with care.
Here are some more signs to help you know whether he wants you to chase him.
- He shows signs of making a move but doesn’t.
- He displays all the signs of being interested in you but doesn’t take it further.
- He flirts with other girls to see your reaction.
- He refuses to make the first move.
- He doesn’t make a move but when you move away, he is hurt or jealous.
- He is having a hard time expressing his feelings for you.
- He does everything right except ask you out.
Getting a relationship to take off in the right vein is not simple or easy. As you don’t know each other well, you have to proceed with caution, feeling your way ahead. You have to rely on your instincts and past experiences to guide you through this difficult phase.
There is nothing wrong with girls chasing guys if you are comfortable with this. After all, this is the 21st century…
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