Is your intuition telling you that the behavior of someone is not right? Do you get the feeling that this someone is plotting against you?
You may have considered this person as your friend and included them in your friend circle. But now you feel as if you are being backstabbed. Unfortunately, this is not uncommon and is considered an integral part of human behavior.
Before you go ahead and place the blame on this “backstabber”, it would be advisable to check if you are suffering from Paranoid Personality Disorder or PPD. This is a mental health condition characterized by doubt and distrust of others without valid reasons.
Those suffering from paranoid personality disorder will firmly believe that others are out to get them and are trying to harm, demean, and threaten them. Once you have ruled out this mental health condition, you can trust your intuition about this person and look out for signs for confirmation.
This article tries to help you ascertain whether your intuition about this person is spot on. Here you will find a few easy-to-spot warning signs someone is plotting against you. Once you know for sure, you can take action to stop the person from harming you and your mental health.
Warning signs someone is plotting against you
Backstabbing and plotting against someone is common in any group setting. Anywhere a few people come together for a considerable period, this behavior is bound to crop up. This is typical behavior in workplaces and housing societies. You may even see this behavior in homes.
The underlying reasons for such behavior are negative human characteristics such as jealousy, insecurity, and excessive competitiveness. As long as people have this unrestrained desire to get ahead of others, they will do things to pull others back and cause their downfall.
You may conclude that someone is plotting against you if you can spot more than one of these signs consistently.
1. They trigger squabbles, skirmishes, and petty fights
You are the kind of person who always tries to avoid harsh words and quarrels but you find yourself getting into silly arguments and confrontations with this person. This gets you thinking. If you are not the one initiating such conflicts, then only the other person can be responsible for this. It looks like this person is drawing you into such situations.
When you confront them with this piece of news and make it clear that you are not going to back down or tolerate it, they will twist it around and call it a tease or a joke. They’ll ask you not to be so sensitive and touchy.
This person knows exactly how to push your buttons. Though you want to ignore it for the sake of your mental health and get on with life, you find yourself ruffled. As a consequence, you react and strike back. You always feel tense in their presence.
2. They badmouth others and spread rumors
They always seem to have spare time to gather trivial information about others and spread it around. They feel powerful when they get hold of juicy gossip about others.
They are always interested in the personal lives of other people and constantly digging for information. They have their own set of informants who intentionally or otherwise reveal inside information about others.
So, it’s up to you not to share your secrets with people. Because you never know who this person’s informant is. Your secret may reach this Machiavellian and they may use it to plot against you.
3. They cozy up to you to gain your trust
People who backstab others will try to befriend you when you meet them for the first time. They may use flattery to humor you and butter you up. They may want to recruit you as an informant and add to their coterie of hangers-on. All their advances are aimed at prying out information from you – either your own secrets or that of others.
If you agree to be part of their circle, they will feed you dirty stories about others to keep you hooked. If you show disinterest in this and ignore their attempts, then, they will show their true colors.
Beware of such people. They may turn against you at any time. Then, they will use all the information you shared with them in any way they want to. This can be against you or another person.
4. They are highly competitive
They are constantly comparing and competing with you about something or the other. Though you don’t engage in such talk or are disinterested, they will keep at this and try their best to draw you into this cesspool.
If you’re on equal footing and you did better than them in anything, they will find it hard to tolerate. They feel they are better than everyone else including you and resent the successes of others. They present themselves as your friend but a true friend will never behave this way.
While they have uncovered so much information about your past, present, and future, you barely know anything about this person. This might make you wonder what kind of friend you are and the kind of friendship you share.
5. They hate to give credit to others and always steal the limelight
They are selfish and inconsiderate when it comes to sharing success. All they are concerned about is themselves. They are hard to get along with as they refuse to be team players. They look down upon others and shirk responsibility.
They are interested in something only if it is beneficial to them in some way or the other. Either it should portray them favorably or it has to be some juicy gossip material. Whenever they can steal credit from others, they do so without any scruples.
When dealing with such people, you should gather proof of all that you say or do. Or else they will twist it as convenient to them.
6. They are fond of pulling you down
This is their favorite pastime – putting you down and pulling you down. They are always plotting and trying to bring you down. They may do this more often when you are doing well and experiencing success. They try to diminish your achievements and criticize you to make you feel bad.
Even their compliments are backhanded and peppered with sarcasm. They talk behind your back and try to undermine the support and respect you enjoy among others. They are always trying to ruin your relationship. They seem to enjoy destroying relationships on purpose.
Such a person constantly plots and turns your friends against you. They may badmouth you to gain sympathy and support for themselves. This is detrimental to your mental health.
7. Their friendships rarely last long
With such behavior, this is to be expected. When they backstab others for their selfish gains, it is hard for anyone to remain their friend. Most of their friendships are superficial and short-lived.
They befriend people only to use them for their own evil schemes. They don’t remain friends with people long enough to form close personal connections. While they end up antagonizing some, others walk away because of their devious behavior.
One of the most convincing signs of a backstabber is the absence of close and long-lasting friendships. This is a red flag you should not ignore.
8. They are manipulative
They know how to play the game of manipulation. They resort to emotional blackmail and mind games in order to get their way. Manipulation is one of the most dangerous signs someone is plotting against you. It can be hard to spot because it looks like an innocent conversation at first but escalates as time passes.
This form of manipulation can take the form of false compliments, exaggerations, lies, and guilt-tripping. Without you noticing it, they are slowly controlling your life and decisions. If someone is trying to control you in this way, be aware and stay alert.
9. They isolate you from others
If someone is plotting against you, they will try to break away from any kind of support system you have. They will try to isolate you from others and prevent them from getting close to you. This is a way of ensuring they are the only ones in your life that you can turn to when things get rough.
They know if someone else gets too close, they will be found out. They don’t want someone to get close enough that they can see the truth and expose them. To protect themselves, they try to keep you away from others who may be able to help you or offer support.
If someone is trying to isolate you, it is a sure sign someone is plotting against you. Be aware and take action if someone is trying to separate you from your support system. Do not let them control your life in any way. Take back the power and reach out for help if needed.
10. They are always two-faced
If someone is plotting against you, they will show one face to the world and another to you. This is a clear sign someone is not being honest with you. They want to make sure you don’t get too close so that their true intentions remain hidden.
You may find them complimenting you in public and criticizing you in private. They may appear nice to you when someone else is around, but their true colors will come out when alone. Be aware of someone’s two-faced nature, and don’t let them fool you.
11. They make you feel unsafe
Sometimes someone may be plotting against you without you realizing it. This can be the scariest situation as you won’t know when and how they will attack next.
In this case, your intuition is the best guide. If someone is constantly making you feel unsafe or uneasy in their presence, it is a clear warning someone is plotting against you. Pay attention to your gut feeling and trust it.
Protect yourself if someone’s behavior has made you feel unsafe or threatened. Don’t put yourself in danger; find someone to help you handle the situation safely.
Recognizing someone is plotting against you can be a complex process. Pay close attention to your surroundings and the people around you. Keeping your eyes open for these warning signs someone is plotting against you can help protect yourself from manipulative people.
Do not allow someone else to destroy your peace of mind and mental stability. Be vigilant and trust your intuition. If someone is trying to harm you, it is time to take action and protect yourself.
Bottom line
They lie and sabotage you without batting an eyelid or feeling bad about it. If you trace back the rumors going around about you, every single time, you will narrow it down to this same person.
Once you identify such behavior and the person associated with it, it’s not hard for you to stay away from such “friends”. If you cannot avoid them altogether, you can limit your contact or at least be on your guard in their presence.
As mentioned earlier, you need to rule out the possibility of paranoia before accusing someone of plotting against you. It isn’t fair to blame someone for your own troubles.