You fell deeply in love with this guy. You felt you have found the man of your dreams.
But as days went by, you sensed something amiss in the relationship. Or is it this guy? You tried to shake off the feeling but it only grew stronger. You felt as if there was a wall towering between the two of you at times. No matter how much you try, you can’t seem to break it down or scale it.
You were at your wit’s end trying to figure out the problem in your relationship.
Is he not interested in a relationship with you? Why is he acting so strangely? If he isn’t interested, why is he showing signs of interest?
There are times when he is as normal as anyone else – loving and caring. But this is momentary. He withdraws back into his shell as soon as he realizes it. He seems to be afraid of revealing his feelings for you. All signs point to your partner as an emotionally broken man.
An emotionally broken man may have suffered emotional abuse in the past. He blocks out the emotions and constructs a wall around him so that no one can hurt him again. He may overcome this mindset for a short while before it comes back again.
But his brokenness doesn’t prevent him from falling in love with you. An emotionally broken man may not showcase his love for you like any other lover, but he definitely shows signs of love for you in his own way.
This article lists the signs a broken man loves you. As these signs are not easily visible or identifiable, you may have to keep a watch out for them.
Foolproof signs a broken man loves you
With the guy’s on-again, off-again attitude, you may be having second thoughts about the relationship. Should you move on or continue working on it?
Something that you need to realize is that an emotionally broken man cannot give you the kind of love, care, and attention you may expect from him. An emotionally broken man tends to love differently. He is definitely capable of love but it may not be the kind of love you’re used to. Only if you can accept him for who he is and adjust to his limitations, should you consider moving forward with the relationship.
You need to remember that an emotionally broken man is already hurt badly. If you aren’t interested or cannot accommodate his needs, you should pull out of the relationship without causing any more hurt to him.
Before that, you may need these signs to recognize that an emotionally broken man loves you.
1. He wants to get better for you
Despite being a broken person, he clearly understands his limitations and how they will impact his relationship with you. If you’re just another person, he may not be interested in making changes in his life for your sake. But when an emotionally broken man is showing a willingness to transform his life and get better, it is a clear sign that he is in love with you.
A broken person is typically unwilling to take responsibility for their actions and life and blames everything and everyone except themselves for their misery. They prefer to portray themselves as the victim and aren’t bothered about how it affects their own lives and their relationships.
If your boyfriend is ready to see himself as an emotionally damaged person, you can consider it the first step toward recovery.
2. He’s nice to you and doesn’t want you to suffer
Your boyfriend is aware of his mental health issues. He recognizes that he has low self-confidence and self-esteem. He knows that he is not consistent in his attitude toward you. He also has limitations in expressing his feelings for you. He is afraid that if he doesn’t make changes in his behavior, he may lose you.
Besides trying to change his ways and habits, a broken person also focuses on changing the way he interacts with you. Just like any other lover, he also wants to please you and make you happy. He may not be capable of doing all that a normal person does, but he tried hard to be nice to you.
A damaged man is aware of how he felt hurt and betrayed by the emotional abuse he suffered. He doesn’t want you to suffer the same pain. He is well aware that some of his behavior may be emotionally abusive to you. He tries hard to stay clear of such negative behavior.
He wants you to feel confident about him and his love for you. All his actions and words are oriented toward making you feel secure and assured in the relationship.
3. He tries to be his best self for you
You cannot ask more from him, even if his best self falls short of your expectations. The damaged man is well aware of his affliction and constraints but wants to be the kind of person you would be proud of. With his kind of mental issues, this is anything but easy for him to manage. But he isn’t ready to give up. He is undeterred by his failures and keeps trying again and again to improve himself.
Isn’t that sweet of him? Even after all these efforts, the damaged man may not come anywhere close to your image of your partner. But you need to give him credit for trying his best. It’s a highly commendable thing that he is doing, considering how difficult it must be for him.
He is clearly not suffering from broken man syndrome that will make him lose interest in everything including life itself.
4. He prefers you take the lead in the relationship
You must know that normal men are not known to do this. They want to be in control and always take the lead, be it in asking you out on a date or proposing to you. However, if you are dating a broken man, he would want you to take the lead.
An emotionally broken man is low in confidence and self-esteem. He may not feel bold enough to take action and make decisions for both of you in the relationship. He doesn’t want you to suffer because of his lack of confidence. He cares for you so much. Instead, he encourages you to make decisions.
A damaged man may be having trouble expressing his feelings for you but he is always concerned about you and your happiness.
Final thoughts on an emotionally broken man’s love
Maintaining a relationship isn’t easy with an emotionally broken man. Things may not be ideal in the relationship. Things may go wrong despite the best efforts of both of you. It’s no one’s fault.
You need to know that emotional intimacy doesn’t come easy or naturally to him. He is always suspicious of others including you and his guard will be up against further emotional pain. His past experiences have taught him that others are always looking for opportunities to hurt him.
However, if your boyfriend is showing clear signs of willingness to improve himself and be his best self, he is evidently in love with you. He may not be expressing his love for you the usual way, as his mental state will highly impact his behavior toward you.
A point to remember is if you are in a relationship with an emotionally broken man – you can love him but you won’t be able to fix him.
Related: Characteristics of a Broken Person