Sometimes, when you are in a relationship, you feel as if it has gone cold. It’s hard to explain or come up with a reason for you to feel this way. But there it is!
When a man changes his behavior and you get that feeling, you feel confused and unsure of what to do. You start doubting and questioning yourself. Somewhere you feel that you are responsible for this turn of events.
You try to talk to your boyfriend about this, but he isn’t keen on a discussion. So, what is happening, after all?
Most probably, he changed his mind about you and has already signed off on the relationship. Unfortunately for you, he is not the kind to make up his mind and move on quickly. He may take forever to let you know or you may get fed up with the situation and walk out of the relationship.
Again, for you to make a decision, you need some solid proof that he isn’t interested in you anymore. There are signs for you to look out for to confirm what is on his mind. If the signs point to your relationship heading for a breakup, you can make it easier and faster for you to heal from it and move on.
This article deals with the heartbreak of a breakup. Here you will find prominent signs he changed his mind about you.
What makes a guy change his mind about a girl?
Guys take their own sweet time to make up their minds about something, especially if it is as important as their life partner. They are anything but impulsive. It’s not often that you find that he changed his mind.
However, a man may have changed his mind about the girl he is dating in certain circumstances. He may have considered you his friend in the beginning and later on developed romantic feelings for you. Reluctantly though, maybe he changed his mind about you.
This may happen in the reverse as well. He fell in love with you and your relationship was going great. But something happens and all of a sudden you find yourself out of favor with him. Maybe he discovered that you are not the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with. Or he changed his mind about wanting a relationship at all. Whatever the reason, he is totally off you.
There is also another possibility. He was never into you in the first place. He always thought of you as a friend but it was you who saw something more in the relationship. So, when you put pressure on them for commitment, they walked away from you. Though technically, it would be wrong to say he changed his mind about you, for all practical purposes, he did that from your perspective.
Signs he changed his mind about you
If you feel something is off in your relationship, it’s time you check for these signs to see if he changed his mind about you. If he has already made up his mind about you and the relationship, there is no point in you investing your time and effort in making it work. Prolonging the relationship will only make matters worse for you.
1. He doesn’t include you in his plans
This can be both long-term and short-term. He carries on with his own activities and goes out with his friends. He makes plans about his career or buying a house without considering your likes/dislikes and convenience. He is making his intentions clear without actually spelling them out.
On the other hand, he always comes up with excuses not to participate in your plans. He is either too busy or too tired. Or he already has made plans to be with his friends. Even if he joins you, he is with you only in person and not in spirit. Clearly, he isn’t interested and isn’t enjoying himself.
He has evidently checked himself out of the relationship. He doesn’t see any reason why he should force himself to do “couple” activities.
2. He turns up late for your date
It’s not once or twice. This has become the norm now that you would be surprised if he is on time. There is no paucity of excuses for coming late. Too much work at the office, heavy traffic, having to take his dad to the hospital, or his meeting running late. You feel amazed at his new excuse every time.
You may believe in his excuses the first few times. You may even make excuses for his behavior with your friends or family. But at some point, you will realize that these excuses are lame. How can you trust the man who changed his mind? You need to wake up to the fact that he has no feelings for you.
3. The frequency of calls/texts has reduced
At the beginning of the relationship, you were either together in person or over the phone. Your friends used to tease you about the number of calls and texts you send each other. All those are things of the past now. The torrential calls and texts have trickled down.
This may not have happened overnight, making it hard to notice. The number kept dwindling slowly yet surely over time. You feel that if allowed to continue this way, it will become nil.
It’s not that he is too busy to answer his phone or reply to the message. You have noticed your common friends getting more time with your boyfriend than you. In such a situation, there is no point in pressurizing him to call/text you more promptly. Your relationship has gone beyond the point of no return.
4. The words “us” and “we” are out of his vocabulary
When your boyfriend is not using these words of togetherness, it should raise a red flag. You must remember the early days of dating when all you could talk about was your future together. There was so much happiness and excitement in daydreaming about it.
Now, the two of you no longer talk about the future or make plans for it. On the other hand, he talks about his plans and in this you are not included. You may turn a blind eye to this for some time, but someday you will have to wake up to this. He changed his mind about you.
5. He reveals his unwillingness to commit unexpectedly
This might make you wonder what he was thinking all this while. The two of you made a whole lot of plans together. At that time, he was well aware of his role and what was expected of him. Now, what has changed that he changed his mind?
Some people do have commitment issues – they are afraid to commit. Otherwise, they are great partners. The moment you bring up the “c” word, they run. He must be one such person.
Trying to convince a commitment-phobic is a waste of time and effort. He is who he is and if he changed his mind, you can do nothing about it. You would be better off moving on and finding someone who appreciates you.
What to do when he gets bored of you?
Are you worried that your partner might be getting bored of you? It’s a common fear in any relationship, but don’t worry – there are plenty of things you can do to keep the spark alive. Here are 10 ways to keep him from getting bored of you:
- Keep things fresh: Try new activities together, explore new places or try a new hobby. The key is to keep things interesting and exciting.
- Be spontaneous: Surprise him with a date night or a weekend getaway. Sometimes the best memories are made when we least expect them.
- Show interest in his passions: Ask him about his hobbies and interests and show genuine interest in what he has to say. This will make him feel valued and appreciated.
- Communicate openly: If something is bothering you, talk about it openly and honestly. Communication is key in any relationship.
- Give him space: It’s important for both partners to have their own space and time apart. Don’t be afraid to give him some alone time if he needs it.
- Be supportive: Encourage him to pursue his goals and dreams, and be there for him when he needs support.
- Spice up your sex life: Introduce new ideas into the bedroom and explore each other’s fantasies.
- Keep yourself busy: Don’t rely on your partner for all your entertainment or happiness – make sure you have your own hobbies and interests too.
- Show appreciation: Make an effort to show gratitude for the little things he does for you, like making dinner or doing the laundry.
- Keep laughing together: Laughter is an important part of any relationship – make sure you find time to enjoy each other’s company and have fun together!
Bottom line
When a man changes his mind about you, you should be ready for what lies ahead of you. When you are in a relationship, going forward under false pretenses can be emotionally damaging for you. Keep your eyes open and look out for these signs. This way, you know what is about to hit you.
When you are aware of what is going on behind the scenes, you may even get the satisfaction of walking out of the relationship. This way, you can reduce the emotional damage and heal quicker. You will also get a head start on rebuilding your life and moving on.
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