Are you an introvert? Do you often feel shy and uncomfortable in social situations? If so, don’t worry – you’re not alone. Millions of people identify as introverts, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
But if you’re looking to become more comfortable in social settings, you can do a few things. In this post, we’ll outline three simple steps for how to stop being an introvert. Keep reading for tips!
Who is an introvert?
An introvert is a person with a personality trait known as introversion. Introversion is characterized by the focus on internal thoughts, feelings, and ideas rather than on external stimuli.
They are happier alone or in smaller gatherings of one or two people and feel out of place in crowds and larger gatherings.
Often the image that comes to our mind about a classic introvert is that of a shy and quiet person who likes to be left alone and prefers their own company. Not all introverts are like this. It all depends on how they view and process the world around them.
Why do you want to stop being an introvert?
While embracing who you are and getting on with life is easier, life as an introvert is not easy. This is more so to keep up with the expectations of society.
For an introvert, fitting into society is hard because they are naturally inclined to be misfits in the loud and overstimulated world filled with extroverts. Every social interaction with the world outside will make them believe firmly that they do not belong there.
They feel that they are oddballs and like square pegs in round holes. The natural human tendency is to fit in. This is the same with an introvert as well. They also wish to discard their introversion and turn into extroverts.
Here are some common reasons introverts cite to change their personality.
1. They feel isolated.
Introverts often feel that they have missed the bus and everyone else is on it. They feel like aliens among humans or the other way around.
When they notice the comfort level among the rest of the people around them, they can’t help envying them. While you find the noise and chaos overwhelming, they seem unfazed by it, even enjoying it at times. They are so sure of what they want, where they want to be, and what they should do to get what they want and where they want to reach.
Some introverts are better equipped to adapt to the chaotic world outside, while a few struggle to make sense of it. This means introversion is found in varying degrees.
The introverts who seem to be better adapted to the outside world are alienated from their own core self, while those who alienate themselves from society are more in touch with who they are. Both are challenging to deal with.
2. They are unhappy.
When the people around them seem to be happy and enjoying life, introverts find themselves all alone and sad. They get the idea that they don’t have what others have. This makes them feel more and more isolated and unhappy. If left unchecked, this will lead to self-loathing.
Why do introverts wish for change?
In many practical aspects of life, being an introvert can turn into a handicap. Or so they feel.
For an introvert, talking to others or performing on stage can be scary, cause social anxiety, and may seem impossible. They seem to have a mental block in that they cannot do what they want to do.
Is it introversion that is creating the myth or is it the mental approach causing trouble?
The hesitation to talk to strangers and stage fright are universal problems, not restricted to introverted personality types.
If introverts realize that the same issues they face are also experienced by extroverted people, they may no longer want to completely discard their personality and want to embrace extroversion.
If you still want to overcome being an introvert, read on.
How to change your introversion?
Introversion continues to be viewed as shyness, social anxiety, and reluctance to mingle. A classic introvert is believed to be scared of strangers and afraid to speak in public. This is not entirely true. There are extroverts suffering from the same maladies.
Understanding the core issues of your inversion is key for the makeover. Here are a few tips that may help you get over your inversion.
- Social interaction when you feel drained or lethargic
- Boost external stimuli
- Speed up your decision-making process, especially the major and serious ones
- Find yourself a trustworthy person to reveal even your innermost thoughts and feelings
- Keep yourself busy with social engagements
- Consult others before you act on your decisions
Introverts turn inward to recharge themselves, extroverts depend on external stimulation to achieve the same. This means to overcome being an introvert, all you need to do is to realign your recharging mechanism.
Here are some ways you can try to stop your inversion.
1. Act out of character
Though this is not a permanent shift of personality from introversion to extroversion, this can help you achieve the goal.
Even though dislike for something is part of your character, you will still endure it when the situation demands it.
For example, you may hate crowded places, but when the local shop is offering attractive discounts, you may overcome your fear and hesitation and put up with the inconveniences to get what you want.
The same is the case when you want to watch sports in person or watch a live performance or a movie in a theater.
2. Trait swaps or free trait agreements
The five broad personality traits are often referred to as OCEAN – Openness, Conscientiousness, Extraversion, Agreeableness, and Neuroticism. These traits are not fixed and are free to be changed.
When something important comes up, even an introvert can swap their inherent traits for something else that is the need of the hour.
For example, they may not be in the mood for a chat, but when their friend needs support, introverts can set aside their preferences and choose to be friendly and talkative.
3. Recharge points or restorative niches
When their energy is exhausted, introverts rely on restorative niches to recharge themselves. These are unique ways people adopt to restore their energy levels.
When an introvert is not aware of their restorative niche, they are clueless about how to restore their energies. Instead, they choose to stop being an introvert.
But what they really need to do is to find their restorative niches or enter into a free trait agreement and agree to act out of character instead of restorative niches. Or else, they run the risk of burnout.
Do you really need to change?
Being an introvert is part of your innate character. This is who you really are. Even if it makes life difficult for you, you can find ways to work with it without changing yourself. Introversion is something for you to understand and integrate with. It’s not something for you to overcome.
Embrace who you are. Work with your personality trait to figure out an amicable solution to the current problem without changing it permanently.
Final Thoughts on Being an Introvert
There is no need to change your personality trait completely and permanently to resolve the issues faced by introverts in daily life. They can overcome challenges and transform introversion into strength, even as they acknowledge and embrace who they are.