Dreaming about the ex is not something you would want to do in normal circumstances. You have already endured so much pain at the time of the breakup that you would like to forget and get past this episode.
In such a situation, when your ex pops up in your dream, you would be naturally angry and upset. Once the initial resentment dies down, you would be curious about it.
Why is your ex coming in your dreams? Is it a bad omen? Is something bad about to befall you? Are you going to run into your ex? Is your ex coming back into your life?
Your mind would be teeming with questions for which you have no answer. That can be pretty frustrating.
Dreams are believed to be messages sent by our subconscious mind to our conscious mind. As you might be aware, there is no direct communication between the two parts of the mind. This again will trigger more doubts.
The subconscious mind must be aware of something about your ex and it is trying to convey this to your awareness. The more you think about it and pay attention to it, the more worked up and stressed out you will get.
How can you figure out the meaning of dreaming about your ex? Psychologists have come up with a set of possible interpretations of dreams about exes. Each one of these meanings applies to a specific situation. Carefully going through them will help you figure out which meaning applies to your dream about your ex.
This article explores the topic of dreams about exes and lists the most common meanings of such dreams. Read the entire article and pick the situation and meaning that suits you the best. And follow through with the right actions to regain happiness in your life.
Spiritual meanings of lucid dreaming about exes
Lucid dreams are believed to be the bridge that connects the subconscious with the conscious mind. The conscious mind deals exclusively with everything that happens in your awareness. Do you know that there is so much more happening behind the scenes beyond your awareness within you as well as around you?
Whenever it is time to bring such information to your awareness, platforms like dreams are made use of. The Universe plays a huge role in all this transfer of ideas and information. Until your awareness needs to know about something, it remains hidden in your subconscious mind. When your conscious mind is ready to receive it, this information transfer happens through dreams.
This explains why we have dreams. Now, let’s move on to the meaning of dreaming about exes.
1. You have a soul connection with your ex.
Have you heard about soul connection? These are individuals who are spiritually linked to one another and their relationship transcends lifetimes. It is believed that soulmates reconnect every time they are reborn.
The twin flame connection is considered the purest of them all. At times a soul breaks into two and inhabits two individuals. However, the relationship is not an easy one as they mirror each other. Due to the turbulent nature of the relationship, breakups and reunions are common for twin flames.
During the twin flame separation phase, it is not unusual to find yourself dreaming about your ex. This is a sign that the twin flame reunion is just around the corner.
Even for regular soulmates, dreams signify a spiritual connection. They are predestined to be together and the ultimate matchmaker, the Universe, is trying to work its magic.
2. You haven’t processed your feelings yet.
This is something most of us don’t care to admit. We want to tell ourselves and the world that we have sorted out our feelings for the exes and all is well. Unfortunately, this is far from the truth.
The fact that you are dreaming about your ex indicates that you may have unresolved feelings for your ex. When you are trying to figure out these feelings, it would help to remember that such feelings need not always be romantic. It can be anger, resentment, or even fear.
Often couples break up without talking things through. Many of their thoughts and feelings will remain unsaid. This will make you feel bitter. You will feel you were treated unfairly. You may also be missing the presence of a partner in your life and the companionship they provided.
With such unresolved issues remaining, these dreams about your ex aren’t at all unusual. In fact, that is an indication of your mind trying to find closure to the relationship.
That said, what can you do about it? How can you stop having such dreams?
These dreams indicate that you have unresolved issues about your breakup and your ex. So the ideal approach to stop these dreams is to resolve the issues. You need to figure out how to find closure to the relationship, breakup, and your ex.
There is no one solution fits all approach to this. Each person is different and so is each relationship and each breakup. While some couples can remain friends after a breakup, others can’t stand the sight of each other. Depending on your circumstances and personalities, you need to find out what works for you.
Here are some suggestions to find closure to the relationship.
Have an open conversation with your ex. Get it all out of your chest. Just remember to keep it civil and within bounds. You can use this opportunity to tell your ex your side of the story and remove any misunderstandings if any.
Confide your feelings with someone you trust. If you are reluctant to have a chat with your ex, you can confide your feelings in someone you can trust. Getting it out of the chest can do you a world of good.
Put all your feelings as a letter to your ex. When you are having a hard time talking about your feelings to your ex or even someone you can trust, you can unburden them by writing it out as a letter addressed to your ex. Whether you want to hand over this letter to your ex or not is up to you.
Get professional help. A therapist can help you process your feelings and move on in life. You will feel safer talking to your therapist without the fear of judgment.
3. You are venturing into a new relationship.
So you broke up with your ex and decided to move on in life. You met someone else and this new relationship is blossoming. Naturally, you compare your current relationship with the past one. You may also compare your current partner with the past one.
There is no need to feel defensive or bad about it. This is merely human nature.
If this is the case, your dreams need not necessarily mean that you have feelings or unresolved issues about your ex. With a new relationship coming up, you find yourself reminiscing about your past one. You may even be considering whether the new one is worth pursuing.
In this instance, the dreams will automatically stop when you decide on a new relationship.
4. You are reminding yourself about your undesirable traits.
Being in a relationship is not all about your partner or journey together. A relationship also reveals a lot about yourself. You may never have been in such a situation otherwise and your reaction to the circumstance reveals much about yourself.
You may associate the relationship with a part of yourself that you consider negative and unpleasant. Though the relationship ended, you continued to hang on to these undesirable traits, promising yourself all the while that you will change. In such instances, a dream about your ex is a reminder to keep your promise to yourself.
Self-love is a vital ingredient of a healthy mindset. You will find it hard to live a happy, content, and peaceful life without embracing yourself wholeheartedly. If you think that you acted unfairly or negatively with your ex when you were together, you should make an effort to make amends. This dream is a reminder.
The Universe is showing you the path to find closure with the relationship. Be gentle and don’t push yourself too hard. Take it slowly and be patient and you can put this past you in due course.
5. You are reluctant to love again.
This is normal after a breakup, especially an ugly and acrimonious one. You are always going to weigh every new relationship or potential partner against this past one. All you can see is the risk looming large in the background. You don’t want to be hurt again.
Whenever you get past this feeling and try to find love again, dreaming about the ex is a warning from the subconscious mind. It is reminding you of how things went wrong last time and asks you not to repeat the same mistakes. Your subconscious mind is just asking you to be careful.
The dream is not meant to dissuade you from your new relationship. It is a gentle reminder to protect yourself from more heartbreaks and safeguard your interests. It is reminding you to look back and learn from your mistakes and try not to repeat them in the new relationship.
You must not be feeling so sure about the new relationship now. Once you decide to go ahead with it or abandon it, these dreams are bound to stop.
6. You want to forgive and forget.
The relationship was painful and hard and the breakup was worse. Despite this, you know that you need to get past this episode in your life. The only way to achieve this is to forgive and forget about your ex, be it your former boyfriend or girlfriend. This and only this will help you find closure.
If you want to live a happy and content life and want to find love again, this step is crucial. By holding on to the past and not letting go of the grudges, you are hurting yourself and your future more than anything else.
Initially, you may not want to even consider forgiveness. After all the pain and suffering you endured, forgiving your ex may seem like letting them off the hook. When you have calmed down enough, you will realize that holding on to the anger and resentment is wreaking havoc in your mind and preventing you from feeling happy again. It is just not worth it.
The Universe is trying to give you hints that it is time for you to get the old relationship behind you. Take the hint and find ways to forgive and forget about the past. You can be happy again.
7. You are missing your ex.
You were a couple for so long that you forgot how it is to be single again. This is one of the saddest parts of a breakup. When a relationship comes to an end, the companionship also ends. You are feeling lonely and missing having someone in your life.
In this case, the dream about your ex doesn’t imply that you have feelings or unresolved issues with your ex. You feel so lonely during your waking hours that you try to fill up your life with the only person you have been with, in your dreams.
Sad as it is, you can use this as a wake-up call to find companionship again. Even if you aren’t yet ready for new love and relationship, you can always have friendships. If you ignore this sign and continue to be lonely, your emotional damage is bound to aggravate.
Just because you feel lonely and are missing the companionship of a partner doesn’t mean you should jump into the next relationship mindlessly. Rebounds usually end in disasters and make you feel even worse. It is ideal to find closure to one relationship before moving on to the next. Give yourself the breathing space to make this happen. In the meanwhile, use this as an opportunity to renew old friendships and find new ones.
8. You are unhappy for some unknown reason.
You associate your ex with pain and sadness. The time spent together was hard and the breakup even harder. Dreaming about your ex may be a sign of unhappiness in your real life. At times the Universe uses symbols like this to get the message across to you.
This dream may indicate the presence of negativity in your life. With this dream, the Universe may be suggesting that you work toward getting rid of this negative element just like you did with your old relationship with your ex.
Whenever you detect negative or toxic elements in your mental space, you should act without delay. If you let it remain a moment longer, this will end up doing more damage. Every second counts.
When you are dreaming about your ex, you can spend some time figuring out this reason for unhappiness. Once you know what is creating discord in your mind, you should find ways to resolve the issue.
Another dilemma you may have to deal with is when you can’t figure out the root cause for feeling sad. Asking yourself pinpointed questions and answering them honestly, you may be able to zero in on the culprit. Here are some indicative questions for you to try.
- “Is my personal or professional life making me unhappy and discontent?”
- “Do I feel happy to come back home at the end of the day?”
- “How enthusiastic do I feel getting up in the morning?”
- “Is any of my habits creating trouble for me?”
- “Is there someone in my life adversely impacting me or pulling me down?”
The answers to these questions should point you in the right direction. Once you figure out the reason, you can work to resolve it and free yourself from the toxic element.
9. Your ex is missing you.
Whether you have a spiritual connection with your ex or not, when your ex is missing you, it may be conveyed to you like a dream.
You may have heard that everything in this universe is made up of energy. And every interaction between living and non-living things results in the exchange or transfer of energy. When someone is thinking about you, without realizing it, they are sending energy your way. This energy may manifest as a dream about the person in you.
Now, you may wonder whether it is the same when you are thinking about your ex as well. Yes, it would be the same. However, for a person to receive the energy, their own energy must be perfectly aligned with that of the Universe. If you are experiencing energy blockage due to the presence of negative thoughts and feelings, you may end up not receiving the signal. This means no dreams.
10. The Universe is getting ready to bring the two of you together.
This mostly happens with twin flames. In other relationships also, this is a possibility. At times, couples walk away from each other due to minor disagreements and misunderstandings. But some of them are meant to be together and the Universe will try to bring them back into a relationship.
After the breakup, you had a tough time getting over the relationship. Finally, you managed to let go of it and moved on in life. You no longer remember your past relationship or your old lover.
When you find yourself dreaming about your ex out of the blue, it is a clear indication that the Universe is trying to remind you of the good times you had together. It is trying to plant the seed of bringing the two of you back together by triggering your long-forgotten feelings for your ex. Seeing your ex in a dream can set off the necessary reactions in your mind.
How to deal with dreams about your ex?
When you realize that you are having frequent dreams about your ex, it is time to sit up and take notice. There are so many reasons why you may have such dreams. Try to figure out why you are having dreams about your ex and what their meanings are.
If you are fortunate enough to interpret your dreams, you can try to correct the mistakes committed or do what you are supposed to do. When a relationship turns sour, in the heat of the situation, both individuals involved will say or do things that they will regret later on. If you leave it at that and part ways, this is going to torment you forever.
In case you are unable to find the exact reason for your dreams about your ex, you can consider these suggestions.
- Forgive your ex and move on in life.
- Forgive yourself for all the hurtful things you said and did as retaliation.
- Try to maintain a cordial relationship with your ex.
- Build bridges and not break them.
- Get more socially active and develop new friendships.
- Do things that you have always wanted to do.
- Prioritize your needs and wants.
- Embrace yourself as you are.
- Surround yourself with people you love and people who love you.
- Indulge yourself and be happy.
No one enters into a relationship thinking it is doomed. What started as a happy and healthy relationship can turn out to be highly toxic in the blink of an eye. Ultimately, you will be forced to part ways. If you can’t manage the breakup amicably, it will continue to torment you in many ways. Dreaming about your ex is one of them.
When you have repetitive dreams about your ex, it can be worrying and disturbing, especially if you had a bad breakup and you haven’t yet found closure. This is the first step you can take to stop dreaming about your ex.
Dreaming about your ex can also be a sign of an unrelated issue in your real life. Once you figure out the real issue you are facing now and find ways to resolve it, your dreams will stop eventually. Dreams are merely messages from the Universe, helping guide you on the right path.
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